sonnyslimjim:

It’s a good day to remember that I had a triceratops plushie for the majority of my childhood named Horny and my parents did nothing

julianbashir:

slimey the worm babey!!!!

YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ursaring:

ursaring:

My mom told me to stop vapeing in the house and my dad just texted me this

Update:

matthewsagan:

interviewer: so why do you want this job?

me:

silkjpg:

lush employee pouring actual dirt into my hands: so I noticed u have dry skin and greasy hair and have no friends because you’re ugly and this will help with all that :) and it’s only $87 :)

pondwitch:

watch and learn, dumbshits *teleports thirty meters below my current position and suffocates on dirt and clay within seconds*

carrionbeast:

spaloonbabooguuscooties:

stop reblogging this. please its not even a real quote

i wont

catstorm26:

aesthetic: powerpoint presentations made by my 4 year old brother in 2001

sweet-bitsy:

Everyone news is over. Don’t report anything else. Nothing else but this matters. News is canceled.

segagigadrive:

magiashley:

obsoletetrillion:

bobonic-plaque:

obsoletetrillion:

bobonic-plaque:

lunavegchick87:

furbearingbrick:

tygressofaera:

Buy and carry a small wedge rubber doorstop.

If you have to lock/barricade yourself in this will stop them hard. They can even shoot the lock or try to kick it in and this works so well that anyone coming after you for whatever reason will have to literally come through the door.

Mass shooters, domestic violence, parental violence, cops, ICE…this will buy time.

REBLOG LIKE THERE’S NO TOMORROW.

ottermatopoeia:

ourladyofanguish:

:o

….

>:|

Stop judging her ??

night1703:

He came here to screech